ASHWORTH, Donna

Let them

Let them argue

let them fight

let them think

they are right

let them gossip

let them rage

let them build

themselves a cage

let them judge

let them talk

let them walk

the way they walk

let them laugh

behind your back

they cannot push you

from your track

let them steal

each other’s joy

let them silence

virtue’s voice

let them wrestle

for the throne

let them pick flesh

from their bones

but of all

you let them do

do not let them

alter you

keep your focus

on the sky

and all the beauty

you pass by

stay within

your well-built walls

and answer only

worthy calls

let them lie

if they must

it’s yourself

you need to trust.


The Art of Ageing Gracefully

Think about it, you have EARNED this face.

Every line, a laugh shared.

Every wrinkle, a year survived.

Every age spot, a day that the sun shone on you.

Some women believe that as they age, they LOSE their looks. Oh my friends how wrong this is.

A beautiful young women is a happy accident of nature but a beautiful older woman?

She is a work of art.

The Japanese have a practice whereby they fill any broken objects with gold, believing that something which is broken has earned its beauty and should be celebrated and decorated rather than discarded.

I feel this way about women.

It took a long time to find out who you really truly are. A long time. The acceptance that old age brings is freeing. It brings with it peace and happiness.

Everyone knows, happiness looks good on us all.

Your body has been changing since the day you were born and will continue till the day you depart. Ride with it, accept it, embrace it. Be amazed by it.

Allow your face to represent your life, your stories, your joys.

Why choose to be an older woman fervently chasing youth, when you could be that older women who knows what she is worth and has earned every minute of her hard-won self-acceptance.

The trick with ageing successfully my friend, is to pay as little attention to it as possible.


To the woman who thinks she isn’t good enough

To the woman who looks around and wonders why everyone else is so much more capable, so much stronger, so much more ambitious than her.

To the woman who thinks everyone else is blazing a fiery path through this thing we call life, while she limps behind, barely getting through the days.

Somewhere, another woman is looking at you thinking exactly the same.

You see, we all look like we’re kinda nailing it, from the outside in.

We all look ‘together’ sometimes.

Catch us on the right day and hey, we look like we have it all.

Because guess what, we learned to look that way a long time ago.

We learned to hide our struggles behind a smile and whack on that mask every day.

And actually, we are doing each other a favour when we show up,

just as we are,

warts and all,

late,

flustered,

human.

What we really need to see is that we are all the same.

We all struggle.

We all fall apart.

Some days we nail it, other days we get nailed.

By hiding our own weaknesses, fears, worries, we give them more power.

If you let it out, shine a light on it all, it becomes so much less scary, funny even…

And goodness only knows we need to laugh.

So, to the woman who wonders if she is good enough…

If this is you.

Yes you are.

You always were.

You don’t have to live up to everyone’s expectation of how you should be coping.

You are human, flawed, wonderful, miraculous, loveable, loved.

I see you,

Now do me a favour and go see all the others too.

Spread the word, we are good enough, just as we are.

Be that woman

Be the kind of woman you want to call when things go wrong.

Be the motivator, the encourager of dreams.

Be the kind of fierce friend you want to have yourself.

Love your girlfriends deeply, they are your sister warriors in this world and only they know just what a crazy, hormonal ride womanhood really is.

Be loyal, love hard.

Be a soulmate, be a sister.

Be strong, be kind.

Listen hard and laugh lots.

Tell the truth but keep the secrets.

Big up everyone you meet.

Kind words travel endlessly.

If you can’t say anything nice don’t say anything at all.

Spread the sparkle of a smile and a compliment whenever you can.

There is room for us all to be happy and successful.

Lend a hand if you’re there already.

Pull your girls up.

Push them if you need to.

Straighten each other’s crowns, spot the lipstick on the teeth and the loo paper on the shoes.

Avoid the drama, smile at the haters, they’re actually admiring you from afar.


Don’t Prioritize Your Looks

Don’t prioritize your looks my friend,

as they won’t last the journey.

Your sense of humor though,

will only get better with age.

Your intuition will grow and expand

like a majestic cloak of wisdom.

Your ability to choose your battles,

will be fine-tuned to perfection.

Your capacity for stillness,

for living in the now, will blossom.

Your desire to live each and every moment

will transcend all other wants.

Your instinct for knowing what (and who) is worth your time,

will grow and flourish, like ivy on a castle wall.

Don’t prioritize your looks my friend,

they will change forevermore,

that pursuit is one of much sadness and disappointment.

Prioritize the uniqueness that make you you,

and the invisible magnet that draws in other like-minded souls

to dance in your orbit.

These are the things which will only get better.


She

I have been her

I have been she

I have been them

And now I’m me.

I have been out

And I’ve been in

I’ve felt defeat

I’ve known the win.

I have held joy

and shouldered grief

I’ve had my share

Of changed beliefs.

I have been hurt

and I’ve been high

I heard the answers

to what and to why.

I know the loss

and I know the gain

I know that we

all bleed the same.

I have been her

I have been she

I have been them

And now I’m me.


History will Remember

History will remember when the world stopped

And the flights stayed on the ground

And the cars parked in the street

And the trains didn't run.

History will remember when the schools closed

And the children stayed indoors

And the medical staff walked towards the fire

And they didn't run.

History will remember when the people sang

On their balconies, in isolation

But so very much together

In courage and song.

History will remember when the people fought

For their old and their weak

Protected the vulnerable

By doing nothing at all.

History will remember when the virus left

And the houses opened

And the people came out

And hugged and kissed

And started again

Kinder than before.


When I go

When I go,
don’t learn to live without me,
just learn to live with my love,
in a different way.

And if you need to see me,
close your eyes,
or look in your shadow,
when the sun shines,

I’m there.

Sit with me in the quiet and you will know,
that I did not leave.

There is no leaving when a soul is blended with another.

When I go,
don’t learn to live without me,
just learn to look for me in the moments.

I will be there.

Don’t miss me more than once a day,

Don’t miss me more than once a day,

For life is moving fast.

Don’t wish all of your time away,

Dreaming of the past.

Don’t waste the moment looking at,

The things I left behind me.

I’m not within those walls or boxes

The heart is where you’ll find me.

Don’t dread to say my name, sweet one,

Don’t fear the wrath of sadness.

Just take the love you had for me,

And turn it into gladness.

Don’t worry when my birthday comes

Don’t feel me missing more.

I’m filled with love you’re sending me,

Just as I was before.

Some days your anger will rush out,

Your tears will find their way.

To me, wherever I am then.

I’ll soothe them all away.

When I am gone don’t miss me more,

Than once, or twice a day.

There’s so much life to live, my love.

I’m with you, all the way .

I’m in the rain

I’m in the rain
I’m in the pain
I’m in the blood within your veins
I’m in the air
My favourite chair
I’m in the soulful way you care
I’m in the night
I’m in your sight
I’m in your heart and holding tight
I’m in the skies
The children’s eyes
I’m in your sobs and in your sighs
I’m in your life
The cause of strife
And that thought cuts me like a knife
My darling one
My moon, my sun
Please don’t let all I was become
Your daily sadness
Source of madness
I used to be a font of gladness
If you can hear
When I am near
Please let me take away the fear
And bring back love
I’m not above
I’m close around you like a glove
So breathe me in
Let life begin
Loss will fade but love will win

You don’t just lose someone once

You don’t just lose someone once

You lose them over and over,
sometimes in the same day.
When the loss, momentarily forgotten,
creeps up,
and attacks you from behind.
Fresh waves of grief as the realisation hits home,
they are gone.
Again .
You don’t just lose someone once,
you lose them every time you open your eyes to a new dawn,
and as you awaken,
so does your memory,
so does the jolting bolt of lightning that rips into your heart,
they are gone.
Again .
Losing someone is a journey,
not a one-off.
There is no end to the loss,
there is only a learned skill on how to stay afloat,
when it washes over.
Be kind to those who are sailing this stormy sea,
they have a journey ahead of them,
and a daily shock to the system each time they realise,
they are gone,
Again .
You don’t just lose someone once,
you lose them every day,
for a lifetime.

One Day

Today, I dared to let myself dream,

That the world will one day open again.

That the locks will loosen, the walls will fall,

The doors will fly open and reunite us all.

I dared to imagine the warmth of a cuddle,

A group of my friends all locked in a huddle.

I felt all the heartbeats, drumming with mine,

I heard all the laughter, I tasted the wine.

I thought of the feelings I’ve missed for long,

The room full of music, united by song.

The freedom to roam, to plan and to meet

To hold someone’s hand, to meet, to greet.

Just for a moment I dared to dream of,

The flights I would board to the places I love.

The moment those eyes would meet mine at the gate,

The feeling of joy after so long a wait.

Today, I dared to let myself dream,

That the life we once had would happen again.

That we’d no longer fear the danger of air,

That our lives would not depend on such care.

They say that we mustn’t wish time away,

But it’s hard, my friend, when faced with a day,

So long in blank hours and so wiped of laughter,

It’s tempting to drift away to thereafter.

So yes, I dared to dream just a while,

Of life coming back, it brought me a smile.

One day I know, this will be in the past,

And hugs will be free, again, at last.


Love came first

You don’t move on after loss, but
you must move with. You must
shake hands with grief, welcome
her in, for she lives with you now.
Pull her a chair at the table and
offer her comfort. She is not the
monster, you first thought her to
be. She is love. And she will walk
with you now, stay with you now,
peacefully, if you let her. And on
the days when your anger is high,
remember who she represents.
Remember. Grief came to you my
friend because love came first.


As Time goes by

As time goes by,

You will loosen your grip on that rock,

The one you always thought was home,

And you will realise that home is not a place,

It’s a state of mind.

Let it go.

As times goes by,

You will learn to see yourself more clearly,

The girl who was always too much of one thing,

And too little of another, was actually

Everything she needed to be.

Let her out.

As time goes by,

You will let the simple things become the big,

And you will allow the big things to become the simple,

And that readjustment will be,

The day you really start to live,

Let it be.

As time goes by,

You will be forced to say goodbye many times,

And your soft little heart will shatter but,

It will still beat and that will bring you,

All the purpose you need.

Let it beat.

As time goes by,

You will stop choosing wealth over peace,

You will stop choosing money over time,

And you will see that the treasures you need,

Are in the smiles and the laughter.

Let them in.

As times goes by,

The moments you remember when your life flashes past,

Are never the awful memories my friend, it’s the joy,

The summer nights, the lazy days with loved ones,

The midnight chats and the morning hugs,

Let them happen.

Let them all happen.