TRETHEWEY, Natasha
    
      
    
      
    Elegy for the Native Guards
  
    
      
                                            Now that the salt of their blood    
  
Stiffens the saltier oblivion of the sea . . .
—Allen Tate
    
      
    We leave Gulfport at noon; gulls overhead
  
trailing the boat—streamers, noisy fanfare—
all the way to Ship Island. What we see
first is the fort, its roof of grass, a lee—
half reminder of the men who served there—
a weathered monument to some of the dead.
    
      
    Inside we follow the ranger, hurried
  
though we are to get to the beach. He tells
of graves lost in the Gulf, the island split
in half when Hurricane Camille hit,
shows us casemates, cannons, the store that sells
souvenirs, tokens of history long buried.
    
      
    The Daughters of the Confederacy
  
has placed a plaque here, at the fort’s entrance—
each Confederate soldier’s name raised hard
in bronze; no names carved for the Native Guards—
2nd Regiment, Union men, black phalanx.
What is monument to their legacy?
    
      
    All the grave markers, all the crude headstones—
  
water-lost. Now fish dart among their bones,
and we listen for what the waves intone.
Only the fort remains, near forty feet high,
round, unfinished, half open to the sky,
    the elements—wind, rain—God’s deliberate eye.
    
      
    
      
    
      
    Flounder
  
    
      
    Here, she said, put this on your head.
  
She handed me a hat.
You ’bout as white as your dad,
and you gone stay like that.
    
      
    Aunt Sugar rolled her nylons down
  
around each bony ankle,
and I rolled down my white knee socks
letting my thin legs dangle,
    
      
    circling them just above water
  
and silver backs of minnows
flitting here then there between
the sun spots and the shadows.
    
      
    This is how you hold the pole
  
to cast the line out straight.
Now put that worm on your hook,
throw it out and wait.
    
      
    She sat spitting tobacco juice
  
into a coffee cup.
Hunkered down when she felt the bite,
jerked the pole straight up
    
      
    reeling and tugging hard at the fish
  
that wriggled and tried to fight back.
A flounder, she said, and you can tell
’cause one of its sides is black.
    
      
    The other side is white, she said.
  
It landed with a thump.
I stood there watching that fish flip-flop,
    switch sides with every jump.
    
      
    
      
    
      
    Theories of Time and Space
  
    
      
    You can get there from here, though
  
there’s no going home.
    
      
    Everywhere you go will be somewhere
  
you’ve never been. Try this:
    
      
    head south on Mississippi 49, one—
  
by—one mile markers ticking off
    
      
    another minute of your life. Follow this
  
to its natural conclusion—dead end
    
      
    at the coast, the pier at Gulfport where
  
riggings of shrimp boats are loose stitches
    
      
    in a sky threatening rain. Cross over
  
the man-made beach, 26 miles of sand
    
      
    dumped on a mangrove swamp—buried
  
terrain of the past. Bring only
    
      
    what you must carry—tome of memory
  
its random blank pages. On the dock
    
      
    where you board the boat for Ship Island,
  
someone will take your picture:
    
      
    the photograph—who you were—
  
    will be waiting when you return
    
      
    
      
    
      
    Housekeeping
  
    
      
    We mourn the broken things, chair legs
  
wrenched from their seats, chipped plates,
the threadbare clothes. We work the magic
of glue, drive the nails, mend the holes.
We save what we can, melt small pieces
of soap, gather fallen pecans, keep neck bones
for soup. Beating rugs against the house,
we watch dust, lit like stars, spreading
across the yard. Late afternoon, we draw
the blinds to cool the rooms, drive the bugs
out. My mother irons, singing, lost in reverie.
I mark the pages of a mail-order catalog,
listen for passing cars. All-day we watch
    for the mail, some news from a distant place.
    
      
    
      
    
      
    Elegy - I think by now the river must be thick
  
    
      
    For my father
  
    
      
    I think by now the river must be thick
  
with salmon. Late August, I imagine it
    
      
    as it was that morning: drizzle needling
  
the surface, mist at the banks like a net
    
      
    settling around us — everything damp
  
and shining. That morning, awkward
    
      
    and heavy in our hip waders, we stalked
  
into the current and found our places —
    
      
    you upstream a few yards and out
  
far deeper. You must remember how
    
      
    the river seeped in over your boots
  
and you grew heavier with that defeat.
    
      
    All day I kept turning to watch you, how
  
first you mimed our guide's casting
    
      
    then cast your invisible line, slicing the sky
  
between us; and later, rod in hand, how
    
      
    you tried — again and again — to find
  
that perfect arc, flight of an insect
    
      
    skimming the river's surface. Perhaps
  
you recall I cast my line and reeled in
    
      
    two small trout we could not keep.
  
Because I had to release them, I confess,
    
      
    I thought about the past — working
  
the hooks loose, the fish writhing
    
      
    in my hands, each one slipping away
  
before I could let go. I can tell you now
    
      
    that I tried to take it all in, record it
  
for an elegy I'd write — one day —
    
      
    when the time came. Your daughter,
  
I was that ruthless. What does it matter
    
      
    if I tell you I learned to be? You kept casting
  
your line, and when it did not come back
    
      
    empty, it was tangled with mine. Some nights,
  
dreaming, I step again into the small boat
    
      
    that carried us out and watch the bank receding —
  
my back to where I know we are headed.
    
      
    
      
    Domestic Work
  
    
      
    All week she's cleaned
  
someone else's house,
stared down her own face
in the shine of copper--
bottomed pots, polished
wood, toilets she'd pull
the lid to--that look saying
    
      
    Let's make a change, girl.
  
    
      
    But Sunday mornings are hers--
  
church clothes starched
and hanging, a record spinning
on the console, the whole house
dancing. She raises the shades,
washes the rooms in light,
buckets of water, Octagon soap.
    
      
    Cleanliness is next to godliness ...
  
    
      
    Windows and doors flung wide,
  
curtains two-stepping
forward and back, neck bones
bumping in the pot, a choir
of clothes clapping on the line.
    
      
    Nearer my God to Thee ...
  
    
      
    She beats time on the rugs,
  
blows dust from the broom
like dandelion spores, each one
a wish for something better.
    
      
    
      
    Pilgrimage
  
    
      
    Here, the Mississippi carved
  
its mud-dark path, a graveyard
    
      
    for skeletons of sunken riverboats.
  
Here, the river changed its course,
    
      
    turning away from the city
  
as one turns, forgetting, from the past—
    
      
    the abandoned bluffs, land sloping up
  
above the river's bend—where now
    
      
    the Yazoo fills the Mississippi's empty bed.
  
Here, the dead stand up in stone, white
    
      
    marble, on Confederate Avenue. I stand
  
on ground once hollowed by a web of caves;
    
      
    they must have seemed like catacombs,
  
in 1863, to the woman sitting in her parlor,
    
      
    candlelit, underground. I can see her
  
listening to shells explode, writing herself
    
      
    into history, asking what is to become
  
of all the living things in this place?
    
      
    This whole city is a grave. Every spring—
  
Pilgrimage—the living come to mingle
    
      
    with the dead, brush against their cold shoulders
  
in the long hallways, listen all night
    
      
    to their silence and indifference, relive
  
their dying on the green battlefield.
    
      
    At the museum, we marvel at their clothes—
  
preserved under glass—so much smaller
    
      
    than our own, as if those who wore them
  
were only children. We sleep in their beds,
    
      
    the old mansions hunkered on the bluffs, draped
  
in flowers—funereal—a blur
    
      
    of petals against the river's gray.
  
The brochure in my room calls this
    
      
    living history. The brass plate on the door reads
  
Prissy's Room. A window frames
    
      
    the river's crawl toward the Gulf. In my dream,
  
the ghost of history lies down beside me,
    
      
    rolls over, pins me beneath a heavy arm.